Addiction
There is little personal progress where addiction determines choices and decisions. Whether seen as disease or lack of self-control, addiction undermines mindfulness and compassion. Therefore, precaution against addiction is an important part of any practice based in mindfulness and compassion.
The most salient feature of addiction is denial. This defence mechanism makes addiction very difficult to treat by caregivers. Denial is an electrified fence around the addict's mental processes. Painful craving and fear of withdrawal fuel denial. A cognitive disconnect develops as the animal brain subverts the frontal lobe. Some form of motivation must be found by the addict to overcome denial. More often than not, this motivation comes in the form of significant human relationships.
A recovering addict ultimately chooses against his relationship with the object of his addiction in favor of healthy relationships. Once this choice is made, the success rate of recovery is better than 50-50. Relapse is common, but is often part of the recovery process.
If addiction is part of your genetic/family history, there is a high likelihood that you will have to deal with some form of addiction personally or in your family system. This is good to know. It enables you to intelligently choose to take precautions in your own behaviors to avoid addiction. However, it still isn't easy.
I recently had a conversation with a man who said, "I go out to the bar once a week and have a few drinks. I have to do it to show I am control of my drinking. I know my father is a bottomed-out alcoholic. So, it's important for me to do this to show I'm not one." Given that this individual is now struggling to remain financially and socially functional, I asked, "Did it occur to you that you might make the point more effectively by having no relationship with alcohol at all?" He laughed knowingly and said, "Yeah, that did occur to me, but...."
Most addicts I have known know they are addicted. Admission of this knowledge is often hard to elicit, but it is usually there, a protected secret. Unlocking that secret is by itself a step to recovery. As a humanist with my own familial relationship with addiction, I feel it is part of my practice to help addicts when I meet them. However, I am aware that no addict can be helped without his willingness to surrender his denial in our relationship. Helping someone with an addiction is a long and often tedious process, punctuated with unrelenting potential for conflict and relapse. It should never be taken on lightly.
This time of year is particularly difficult for alcoholics and other addicts. Social celebration to an addict is license for total surrender of self-control. Friends and family often become mindless enablers. Binges, started over the holiday season, often extend for months with disastrous consequences, as those who are not addicted or less addicted carry on with their lives without the addict in tow.
I believe being a humanist entails being aware, or mindful, of the health needs of the people around me. Acting compassionately sometimes entails helping people to work against addiction, despite the repercussions and difficulties which this may bring. It is also important for me to be mindful of my own limits, when an addict ultimately chooses his addiction over my help.
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| Illustration: Secular Organizations for Sobriety |
A recovering addict ultimately chooses against his relationship with the object of his addiction in favor of healthy relationships. Once this choice is made, the success rate of recovery is better than 50-50. Relapse is common, but is often part of the recovery process.
If addiction is part of your genetic/family history, there is a high likelihood that you will have to deal with some form of addiction personally or in your family system. This is good to know. It enables you to intelligently choose to take precautions in your own behaviors to avoid addiction. However, it still isn't easy.
I recently had a conversation with a man who said, "I go out to the bar once a week and have a few drinks. I have to do it to show I am control of my drinking. I know my father is a bottomed-out alcoholic. So, it's important for me to do this to show I'm not one." Given that this individual is now struggling to remain financially and socially functional, I asked, "Did it occur to you that you might make the point more effectively by having no relationship with alcohol at all?" He laughed knowingly and said, "Yeah, that did occur to me, but...."
Most addicts I have known know they are addicted. Admission of this knowledge is often hard to elicit, but it is usually there, a protected secret. Unlocking that secret is by itself a step to recovery. As a humanist with my own familial relationship with addiction, I feel it is part of my practice to help addicts when I meet them. However, I am aware that no addict can be helped without his willingness to surrender his denial in our relationship. Helping someone with an addiction is a long and often tedious process, punctuated with unrelenting potential for conflict and relapse. It should never be taken on lightly.
This time of year is particularly difficult for alcoholics and other addicts. Social celebration to an addict is license for total surrender of self-control. Friends and family often become mindless enablers. Binges, started over the holiday season, often extend for months with disastrous consequences, as those who are not addicted or less addicted carry on with their lives without the addict in tow.
I believe being a humanist entails being aware, or mindful, of the health needs of the people around me. Acting compassionately sometimes entails helping people to work against addiction, despite the repercussions and difficulties which this may bring. It is also important for me to be mindful of my own limits, when an addict ultimately chooses his addiction over my help.
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