Emptying

Those who meditate know the feeling. As the rhythmic pace of breath relaxes in meditation, the mind feels a freeing, an emptying of obsessive thoughts, of stress. It is quite wonderful.

Emptying my life of the unnecessary has been a major part of my practice in recent years. Just asking the question, "What is necessary or needed for my maintaining balance, peace and joy in my life?" is a helpful exercise which I do regularly. Breaking from the cycle of asking, "What do I want?" to the conscious habit of asking, "What do I need?" is helpful as a first step to finding the necessities of happiness.

We all need basic things. We need proper nutrition, good air, good water. Regular exercise and regular sexual release are also necessary for good health. Social relevance is a human need. We do not need to drive a car or live in a condominium. We choose lifestyles that may lead to wanting these things. There is a basic difference between what we need as thinking animals and what we desire or crave.

Mindfulness is the path to knowing what I need, not just what I want. My wants are often driven by fear or anger. My needs are driven by simply being human. Developing an inner and timely awareness of these differences saves me a lot of stress and aggravation.

The emptying of the mind which comes with meditation is very helpful to me in developing this awareness of need vs. want. I first experienced the tremendous relief this emptying of the mind can bring when I was in cancer treatments. On a day when I was rolled into a ball of pain, I forced myself to straighten out on my mattress as best I could. I began to breathe deeply and to chant a familiar Buddhist chant. Soon I was simply breathing deeply and rhythmically. My pain abated. My mind cleared. I knew I was doing what I needed to do, as opposed to wanting some magical release from my pain.

I have come to realize that a great deal of my psychic pain over the years was my own doing. By wanting to be someone or somewhere else, I was ignoring I really needed. I accumulated things and people in my life as remedies for my unmet needs. I did things I wanted to do without needing to do them. If I had spent more time emptying my mind and getting in touch with my real human needs, I would have had more happy moments.

Emptying brings that incredible lightness of being which feels like walking on air. It can be achieved without alcohol or drugs. For some, it takes more practice than for others. We all come to mindfulness with different burdens and aptitudes. Practice is practice. It is the practice of emptying the mind which pays off. Letting go of the inconsequential opens the mind to the consequential. It lights my way.