Doubt

Every morning I experience doubt when I open my blank blog composer. Yes, doubt. I doubt my own ability to formulate my ideas. I doubt the validity of those ideas. I doubt my own practice's worth. 

This doubt is healthy. It is the basis of my skepticism and inquiry in most cases. I reject the mentality of the enthusiast and the converted. I half strolled down that shallow cul-de-sac more than once. I learned things there, but also learned that my path is best aimed toward the horizon, wherever that may take me. The safe certainty of the cul-de-sac life was a stifling illusion when subjected to my skeptical thought.

Embracing doubt, like embracing change, is not a warm and fuzzy experience. If I want warm and fuzzy, I'll hug a cat. Doubt is a prickly friend. Change is a fickle lover. However, in the light of my personal truth, doubt and change are necessary companions in my daily practice.