Reciprocity

"Old Friends" by Jim Van Geet

Reciprocity is a necessary part of most human relationships with the exception of the parent-infant relationship. Relationships without some form of intentional reciprocity are imbalanced. Dysfunction occurs when reciprocity in relationships is unintentional or lacking. In other words, two or more people may develop a pattern of reciprocating anger and hostility unintentionally. Bickering is one symptom of this. Violence is a more severe symptom. 

Developing an intentionally, candidly and respectfully reciprocal relationship is the key to sustaining friendship. Reciprocity based only on superficial social etiquette may lead to a popular social life, but it may not develop intimate and sustainable relationships. These relationships are based more on trade than love. 

Remaining a contributing partner in any friendship requires effort, compassion and consciousness. The free exchange of ideas and feelings without barriers creates a bond which can endure aging, disease and separation. These relationships, in my experience, do not come by the dozen. These are not the "friendships" of a Facebook page.